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Heather's Story
Posted January 20,
2006
My husband and I will be
trying to conceive with donor
sperm in March. We know our donor, he is a very
dear friend. I've come to read your stories just to
hear what others' experiences are. I'm compelled to
write to those who worry that the child will not be
biologically theirs and that they or the child might
feel differently about them.
I myself was adopted. My
birthmother gave me to her brother and his wife when
I was 5 months old. I grew up thinking my birth mother
was my aunt on my father's side. I knew I had been adopted
because my parents wanted me badly and could not conceive
on their own, but I did not know who my birth mother
was until I was much older. My parents raised me with
values around what makes a mommy or a daddy. It's always
been very clear to me who loved me unconditionally --
they are not my "adopted parents" they are
my parents. We are very close and I feel very fortunate
to have been wanted so much! I never cared who my bio
parents were, I felt loved and wanted and cared for.
My parents INTENDED to have me and they did a darn good
job of it. I thank my lucky stars that I landed with
them!
I hope this story may help
some who are struggling with this. From the perspective
of a child who grew up without either bio parent --
I am well adjusted and in a happy secure marriage, I
know my biomother and maintain a relationship with her
-- she has her place in my life but neither she nor
my biological father will EVER replace my mommy and
daddy!
Find out more about
sperm donation.
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