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Allison's Story
I have read all the amazing
stories on this site and many others & I feel the
happiness that the option of using a sperm donor gave
many men and women. I understand that happiness very
well.
I am a child from a sperm
donor. I just learned that my birth father was not my
biological father. Being just 15 years old when I learned
this, it was very powerful emotionally.
I am still trying to cope
with not knowing anything about my biological father:
Why he gave his sperm? Did he know that sometime down
the line a child, his own flesh and blood, would be
living and he would know nothing about him or her? It
is hard walking down the street, seeing someone that
looks like me, knowing that possibly that person is
my biological sister, brother, father, uncle, aunt,
cousin, grandfather, or grandmother. They could be related
to me, they could the share my background... and I will
never know. It is really scary and I don’t know
what to think...
I am so happy that my parents
decided to look for a sperm donor -- I wouldn't exist
if they didn’t. I wouldn't know anything about
my mother’s family & that would kill me, I
know adopted children feel this way too, but most of
them have the chance to pull some strings and find their
biological family. They are able to find where they
came from. I don't have that opportunity.
I don’t think my biological
father understands the consequences -- even if he was
a medical student. I still am not convinced that he
understood that he was going to be the father of a child.
I see ads all the time saying: “Need extra cash?
Sperm Donors Needed.” Do sperm donors realize
that they aren’t just earning money; they are
creating a life?
I am so happy that my mother
was able to become pregnant & to have the special
bond with me and my sister... I just wish I had a chance
to know more about my biological father. All I know
is his height, weight, eye & hair color & that
he was Dutch. I will never have the chance to know more.
I would like all the parents
out there to know that sperm donation is a great thing,
but don’t let your children go on thinking that
their birth father gave them life & that their hands
came from him. Yes, my dad gave me another type of life,
but he will never be able to understand that I want
to know where my hands, feet, eyes, wild hair, and athletic
ability came from. I love my dad, but I long to know
if I have any other siblings... I wish my biological
father could know how much I want to talk to him, just
for 2 minutes, to finally understand why he gave his
sperm.
If you are thinking about
sperm donation, it is a great and wonderful thing. Your
child will love you as if s/he is your biological child,
but it is like being half adopted. Understand the child's
need to search for who made him or her look the way
s/he does... and always remember that despite this curiosity,
your child will never forget what their birth father
gave them.
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